The Twilight books ~ is it sending the wrong message about love and life to our daughters?

l_5ee2d9454a2c45f2a5a1037ba055082c

So many of us are fans of the Twilight Saga yet we still don’t fall under that Twi-Tard category

*disclaimer ~ when mentioning Twi-Tard, this by all means does NOT mean all Twilight fans.  I myself am a fan of the books and also a fan of Robert Pattinson and most of the other cast.  I just have a problem when you go into a site and all they can focus on is one thing and you can’t get away from it.  When you try and have a friendly debate you are attacked and called an old shrew who will curl up in the fetal position and DIE when it is found out that what they believe is true.  Hey I don’t care, but I should be able to go to these sites and talk to people about Twilight not just Robsten, it fucking drives me crazy.  For anyone who is offended by this then either you fit into the Twi-Tard category or you just don’t get what I am saying. So sorry….

First off, I am not saying that the Twilight books are bad!! I think they are

what a perfect love...Bella and Edward, but Rob and Kristen ARE NOT Bella and Edward.  I think people forget that sometimes :(

what a perfect love…Bella and Edward, but Rob and Kristen ARE NOT Bella and Edward. I think people forget that sometimes 😦

great books for everyone. I just think as Parents we need to talk to our daughters and make them understand that trying to be Bella is not a good idea and being yourself is always best. We need to stress, just because they are in love on-screen does not mean Rob and Kristen are in love off-screen and not to get all wrapped up in the Robsten bullshit. There is more in life than that. Anyway, just sayin….

Okay, so I was going to bed but I thought first I would check out Twitter because I haven’t been there in a couple days hence this is why I fucking totally missed out on watching the New Moon Trailer *Nans doing her own cliff dive in a second*….Anyway, I went to check it out and of course for some ridiculous reason ( I think it is out of morbid curiosity) I strolled on into one of the Twi-tard sites. We ALL know how much I love them and there Fucking dumb assed Robsenite beliefs, not to mention their sick and twisted new religion Cullenism. Yes, it actually is some sort of pseudo  religion that somebody in there bragged about starting and believe in but please don’t get me started on that. *can you say psychos??*

Bella has ONE really close friend...maybe a bit TOO close?  Tsk Tsk Bella, when the Vampire's away the wherewolf will play

Bella has ONE really close friend…maybe a bit TOO close? Tsk Tsk Bella, when the Vampire’s away the werewolf will play

So, I am in there because I saw an interesting tweet I wanted to check out that said “Will Twilight ruin your love life”? Well, knowing this site, I thought it had to be pretty fucking dumb but when I read this I felt like it was actually POST WORTHY!!!! Ummm, more than likely because an actually educated person with a brain wrote it. Here is what this woman had to say about Twilight and to tell you the truth everything she said is true. Why does it not surprise me that all the Twi-Morons are freaking out about her opinion and not understanding what she was getting at in the first place.  *someone just shoot me now, please*

Please read on:

One of Glamour’s female dating bloggers gets on the “Twilight” train and finally reads the book everyone’s been talking about. But what they aren’t talking about is the not-so-great romantic role models in the book …

Some of you told me I wouldn’t like Twilight, but I bought the book anyway

Edward having his afternoon snack...this would have put a whole new twist on thing now wouldn't it?

Edward having his afternoon snack…this would have put a whole new twist on things now wouldn’t it?

just to see what all the hoopla was about. Well, I finally finished it, and … I appreciated the romance-factor, but I couldn’t help thinking it was giving girls the wrong idea about love and relationships. I did a feminist reading of Twilight and here’s what bugged me:

1. Bella has no outside hobbies.
After she moves to Washington, Bella makes a few friends, but she’s not interested in them. Mostly her life is about Edward, Edward, Edward. But what relationship can survive that? Take it from Simone de Beauvoir, who writes about this in The Second Sex: “Two lovers destined solely for each other are already dead: they die of ennui, of the slow agony of a love that feeds on itself.” (658)

Outside interests breathe life into a relationship. If you want a healthy one, you better get a life, whether you’re a dead vampire or not. On the other hand, Romeo and Juliet were teenagers obsessed with each other, so I don’t know what to make of that.

2. The guys are totally unrealistic.
Women are always writing male characters how we’d like guys to be — not how they really are. We’re setting up expectations. In Twilight’s beach scene, Mike Newton brings Bella “sandwiches and an array of sodas to choose from” (118). Excuse me, but a teenage boy at a beach is either going to be goofing around with the other boys, throwing marshmallows, or spending hours in the water.

definite perfection here

definite perfection here

3. Bella is brainwashed.
Bella tells us repeatedly that Edward the smug vampire is “too perfect,” (256) “flawless,” (261) and has an “angel’s face” (262). I nearly got brainwashed. But it’s like, he could kill her at any second, yet she continues to trust and lust. Of course he doesn’t kill her, so we’re supposed to be grateful and think highly of him. Such manly restraint!  But he is always talking down to her about her safety, like she’s a porcelain doll. He tells Bella he can’t leave her alone for a second. Even doing laundry, he speculates she might fall into the dryer. Really? There’s nothing wrong with being a clutz, but even joking like she can’t possibly function … well, that doesn’t do wonders for a girl’s confidence. It turns her into a dependent. And as my mom says, no one loves a helpless woman. Obviously, for the story, it’s the knight in shining armor thing, I get it, but I don’t have to like it.

4.Bella is a domestic diva.
She cooks for her bachelor dad every night. (Okay, I guess cooking is

Bella and Charlie, always taking care of daddy. Get a life Bella ~ Jeez

Bella and Charlie, always taking care of daddy. Get a life Bella ~ Jeez

technically a hobby. But she doesn’t do it out of joy, really. It’s more out of a sense of obligation.) Bella does laundry, too. But I think we only see her do homework once. See, she’s too busy feeding a man to stop and feed her mind. There’s nothing wrong with cooking for a man, but doing it in tandem with constantly getting saved by a guy and worshipping said guy … it’s just too much. At least Belle in Disney’s Beauty and the Beast loves to read, right?

But! I am not saying I didn’t enjoy the book at times, and that I wouldn’t have swooned at 13. I just worry that some people will read it without a critical eye (I know, it is just a story). Some girls might expect their love life to look just like Bella’s. Now that’s what I call scary.
***********************************************************************************

Glamour Article By:  Erin Meanley

When I wrote this I had no idea who this woman was but the site that had it posted was going nuts showing her nothing but hate.  She definitely had something important for any woman to pass on to their daughters.

This is what I took away from the article and hopefully you did too…..Twilight may be a great book and have a fantasy love to top all others but that is just it, IT IS A FANTASY and no one should try and emulate anything about the characters. They should strive to be themselves and be happy with who they are. If you aren’t happy with who you are and can’t love yourself, how do ever expect anyone else to truly love you? THAT is the message to send to your daughters.

*Thank you Devon for giving me the info so that I can give credit where credit is due 🙂

Advertisements

9 Comments

  1. Thank you! I couldn’t agree more. I have actually seen a family end because the woman was so obsessed with Bella and Edward’s “perfect” relationship that she became dissatisfied when her’s was not like their’s. Course, that probably means there were some underlying issues there before, but… People really need to realize that relationships are nothing like that. And yes, it’s fun to romanticize about someday finding your own Edward or Bella, but there’s got to be a point that you stop and realize it’s all just one big fantasy.

    P.S. The writer’s name is Erin Meanley.

    Like

    • Thanks, I will go give her credit in a minute. I appreciate the possitive comment, it is one of a very few I seem to get around here 🙂

      Like

  2. i found your blog through a search results, very interesting.

    Like

  3. thank for sharing this with all of us. Of course, what a great site and informative posts, I will bookmark
    this site. keep doing your great job and always gain my support.
    cheers

    Like

  4. Id have to seek answers out of you here. Which seriously isn’t some thing Which i do! I such as reading a post that can make people feel. Also, thanks for allowing me to comment!

    Like

    • I am always glad when my readers comment however may I suggest in the future you sign up with your own name instead of the website name that you have used because it automatically goes to my spam file and sometimes takes me quite awhile to find it and approve and answer the comments 🙂

      Like

  5. certainly along the lines of your website but you have to check the spelling on quite
    a few of your posts. A number of them have been rife
    with spelling problems and I get a hold of it very troublesome to tell
    that the truth nevertheless Ill certainly come
    back again.

    Like

    • Seeing as how I try to use spell check before publishing any articles, I am not sure what you are talking about but I would love it if you could point out some of the errors that need to be fixed and I will fix them?? I have been able to catch a few that have slipped through the cracks but it is not like my site is plagued with grammatical errors and poor use of spelling and the English language like I see on so many sites out there.

      Like

  6. I’ve just stumble upon you post by accident.. And, I totally agree with you. I’m 23 years old, and I am a Twilight fan. And, I agree this story give the wrong message to teens. The implications of the plot is that Edward is only in ‘Love’ with Bella.. Because of her scent, and he wants to suck her blood.. If that not sexual, then I don’t know what is.. This has all signs pointing to lust, rather than love.

    And, the creepiest part in Breaking Dawn part 1. Was when Bella was giving birth and Rosalie was ready to eat her, because of the blood.. are you serious.. that’s was gross. That should of been edited, seriously.
    Yet, the guys in Twilight are totally unrealistic.. Edward Cullen is just.. whoa perfect. However, I would like to believe there is someone out there like him.. lol. Yet, I have to disagree with you. I like a man that looks after me like a ‘porcelain doll’ ( as you see I have daddy problems lol j.k).. so a little brainwash doesn’t hurt.

    And Bella is totally needy; However, I think she has the upper hand in the relationship. She found a way to keep werewolf, and the vampire..

    And, the new religion ‘Cullenism’.. Yeah, I agree that’s a little creepy

    It’s enthralling story. But, in various ways sends off the wrong message.
    Great Post! Really. Hilarious. Unlike many people, I love a little realism 😉
    Nailah D’arcy

    Like


Comments RSS TrackBack Identifier URI

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s